Dan & Phil Part 29: Horton hears two b*tch ass liars

Our two favourite full time internet nerds who never go outside!
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karma_yeah
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mermaid blood wrote:yes please give us the deets i want to know what they smelled like

kidding

no im not
Definitely spill the beans! I know I'll never get to meet them.

and I do want to know what they smell like -- not kidding :D

is this the top of the page? seriously?? soz
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eevee
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Hello I am here with Too Much Analysis.
So Phil's story is based around the idea that he saw a wombat, got excited, and then told Dan that the wombat looks like Dan. "That looks like you." SO I'm no psychology major but this is what I take from that in order of least reachy to most reachy:

1. It was probably a compliment. Phil didn't say it in any joking way or as if it would be a joke-insult. Even in the story it sounded really fond with his tone. And I fucking live for Phil compliments. Especially when they're to Dan.
2. Wombat = Excitement = Happiness = Dan. So Phil was happy about seeing a wombat and the first thing it made him think of was Dan. Not "hey Dan, look at that wombat." Like, that wombat IS Dan. Because it's awesome. And Dan is awesome.
3. As Riz pointed out to me, wombats are fluffy and cuddly, obviously Phil was associating a fluffy cuddly cute thing with Dan, his cuddly cute boyfriend.

And that's all I got but it's lit.

By the way this is a wombat:
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Phil looks like he went to sleep at 6 AM and is dying inside, Dan glows like he spent the night having orgasms - Ticia
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eevee wrote:Hello I am here with Too Much Analysis.
So Phil's story is based around the idea that he saw a wombat, got excited, and then told Dan that the wombat looks like Dan. "That looks like you." SO I'm no psychology major but this is what I take from that in order of least reachy to most reachy:

1. It was probably a compliment. Phil didn't say it in any joking way or as if it would be a joke-insult. Even in the story it sounded really fond with his tone. And I fucking live for Phil compliments. Especially when they're to Dan.
2. Wombat = Excitement = Happiness = Dan. So Phil was happy about seeing a wombat and the first thing it made him think of was Dan. Not "hey Dan, look at that wombat." Like, that wombat IS Dan. Because it's awesome. And Dan is awesome.
3. As Riz pointed out to me, wombats are fluffy and cuddly, obviously Phil was associating a fluffy cuddly cute thing with Dan, his cuddly cute boyfriend.

And that's all I got but it's lit.

By the way this is a wombat:
Image
Sooo cute. So squishy like Dan.
Didn't Phil buy a fluffy wombat plushy and had a wombat as his laptop's wallpaper for the longest time? They've been giving clues all this time.
Jk. I'm a trash.

EDIT: I just remembered. It was a capybara. Nevermind.
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mermaid blood
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so dan's fursona is a wombat? i could actually see that. nocturnal, territorial, burrowing, very maternal, solid like mini boulders they smash the shit out of your bumper if you hit one at night accidentally. (srsly they're so dangerous)

Phil's comment reminded me of this:


"well you do look like a woodland animal."

so yeah, i think he does think Dan is cute in that way and that was a compliment/fond thing that he accidentally said to the rando (lol poor phil).

Can we talk about Dan's embarrassing story?? my bumhole clenched so tight listening to it that is my worst nightmare.
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karma_yeah
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eevee wrote:Hello I am here with Too Much Analysis.
So Phil's story is based around the idea that he saw a wombat, got excited, and then told Dan that the wombat looks like Dan. "That looks like you." SO I'm no psychology major but this is what I take from that in order of least reachy to most reachy:

1. It was probably a compliment. Phil didn't say it in any joking way or as if it would be a joke-insult. Even in the story it sounded really fond with his tone. And I fucking live for Phil compliments. Especially when they're to Dan.
2. Wombat = Excitement = Happiness = Dan. So Phil was happy about seeing a wombat and the first thing it made him think of was Dan. Not "hey Dan, look at that wombat." Like, that wombat IS Dan. Because it's awesome. And Dan is awesome.
3. As Riz pointed out to me, wombats are fluffy and cuddly, obviously Phil was associating a fluffy cuddly cute thing with Dan, his cuddly cute boyfriend.

And that's all I got but it's lit.

By the way this is a wombat:
Image
I was a psychology major and your theory makes perfect sense to me. I think that happens with Phil a lot. When ever anything excites him he thinks of Dan/wants to share it with Dan.

Which is why I was not surprised in the baking vid when Dan made a sassy comment early on and hopped out of the frame with Phil watching him fondly, the next thing out of Phil's mouth was "Do you think anyone's sexually attracted to spiders" (Dan).

Phil's def got a thing for animals. (refraining from furry joke)
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Welp, hiddenwombat, it looks like it's your time to shine!
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hiddenwombat
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yes hello it is i senpai is talking about me

Every cute cuddly creature with brown hair and brown eyes is Dan. Does anyone have a compilation of all the times Phil has compared Dan to something? Off the top of my head i feel like they say "it looks like you hurr hurr" to each other a lot either if its super cute or super hideous.

monster pop discussion is long gone but things I haven't heard anyone mention yet
-The sheepish worried glance Phil gives to Dan when he realises the paper is going to tear along the side, and Dan's slight face twitch when he sees the tear go horribly wrong :lol: easily my favourite part of the video.
- Nobody has mentioned the icing they are using is from the spooky cupcakes TWO YEARS AGO!!! I refuse to believe they went out and bought new icing of the same kind they used before. That shit has been in their pantry collecting dust and being gross I'm sure they did a slight sniff test and just went ok yeah fuck it. ewwwww
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mermaid blood
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oh...my god. you guys.

(spoiler- short Dapgo audio clip:)
dearest dizzy just sent me this that she kindly recorded (i can't get the audio till next week) and i can't stop replaying and smirking.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0aKmCDrw4V3
Dan: It was fun! Vegas is like a horrible, tacky theme park that is just like the worst place in the world, but yet really amazing and funny.
Phil: Yeah I loved it, I had a great time.
Dan: By that you mean, you had lots of waffles.
Phil: I had a lot of...intense waffles...

Um...what is with that tone? that makes no sense? and waffles, what has that got to do with Vegas? why did he just say intense about waffles? why did they make waffles into a euphemism with that suggestive tone? euphemism for what? the reason they had a great time on the night of Dan's birthday? what?
i can't believe that was an injoke between them this whole time. those cheeky bastards! that is hilarious to me. my mind is filling with the filthiest thoughts.
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jesuisunèléve
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mermaid blood wrote:oh...my god. you guys.

(spoiler- short Dapgo audio clip:)
dearest dizzy just sent me this that she kindly recorded (i can't get the audio till next week) and i can't stop replaying and smirking.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0aKmCDrw4V3
Dan: It was fun! Vegas is like a horrible, tacky theme park that is just like the worst place in the world, but yet really amazing and funny.
Phil: Yeah I loved it, I had a great time.
Dan: By that you mean, you had lots of waffles.
Phil: I had a lot of...intense waffles...

Um...what is with that tone? that makes no sense? and waffles, what has that got to do with Vegas? why did he just say intense about waffles? why did they make waffles into a euphemism with that suggestive tone? euphemism for what? the reason they had a great time on the night of Dan's birthday? what?
i can't believe that was an injoke between them this whole time. those cheeky bastards! that is hilarious to me. my mind is filling with the filthiest thoughts.
Waffles=orgasms.
Cora
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mermaid blood wrote:oh...my god. you guys.

(spoiler- short Dapgo audio clip:)
dearest dizzy just sent me this that she kindly recorded (i can't get the audio till next week) and i can't stop replaying and smirking.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0aKmCDrw4V3
Dan: It was fun! Vegas is like a horrible, tacky theme park that is just like the worst place in the world, but yet really amazing and funny.
Phil: Yeah I loved it, I had a great time.
Dan: By that you mean, you had lots of waffles.
Phil: I had a lot of...intense waffles...

Um...what is with that tone? that makes no sense? and waffles, what has that got to do with Vegas? why did he just say intense about waffles? why did they make waffles into a euphemism with that suggestive tone? euphemism for what? the reason they had a great time on the night of Dan's birthday? what?
i can't believe that was an injoke between them this whole time. those cheeky bastards! that is hilarious to me. my mind is filling with the filthiest thoughts.
Eh, I'm not hearing a tone. Not a sexual inside-jokey one at least.

"I loved that club!"
"By that you mean you had lots of drinks"
"I had a lot of intense drinks"

Waffles can be intense when you're a British boy eating food stuffs in America where we make shit bigger and badder and cover it in whip and chocolate and kitchen sinks
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jesuisunèléve wrote:
mermaid blood wrote:oh...my god. you guys.

(spoiler- short Dapgo audio clip:)
dearest dizzy just sent me this that she kindly recorded (i can't get the audio till next week) and i can't stop replaying and smirking.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0aKmCDrw4V3
Dan: It was fun! Vegas is like a horrible, tacky theme park that is just like the worst place in the world, but yet really amazing and funny.
Phil: Yeah I loved it, I had a great time.
Dan: By that you mean, you had lots of waffles.
Phil: I had a lot of...intense waffles...

Um...what is with that tone? that makes no sense? and waffles, what has that got to do with Vegas? why did he just say intense about waffles? why did they make waffles into a euphemism with that suggestive tone? euphemism for what? the reason they had a great time on the night of Dan's birthday? what?
i can't believe that was an injoke between them this whole time. those cheeky bastards! that is hilarious to me. my mind is filling with the filthiest thoughts.
Waffles=orgasms.
The only logical explanation.
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mermaid blood
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ohhh, orgasms makes more sense than sex. god i'm daft.
*filthy snicker*

Cora i'm sorry you can't hear it, that sucks!
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alittledizzy wrote:
jesuisunèléve wrote:
mermaid blood wrote:oh...my god. you guys.

(spoiler- short Dapgo audio clip:)
dearest dizzy just sent me this that she kindly recorded (i can't get the audio till next week) and i can't stop replaying and smirking.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0aKmCDrw4V3
Dan: It was fun! Vegas is like a horrible, tacky theme park that is just like the worst place in the world, but yet really amazing and funny.
Phil: Yeah I loved it, I had a great time.
Dan: By that you mean, you had lots of waffles.
Phil: I had a lot of...intense waffles...

Um...what is with that tone? that makes no sense? and waffles, what has that got to do with Vegas? why did he just say intense about waffles? why did they make waffles into a euphemism with that suggestive tone? euphemism for what? the reason they had a great time on the night of Dan's birthday? what?
i can't believe that was an injoke between them this whole time. those cheeky bastards! that is hilarious to me. my mind is filling with the filthiest thoughts.
Waffles=orgasms.
The only logical explanation.
This tweet pretty much confirms it
busy being happy~
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mermaid blood
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can men even...have 7 waffles?
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alittledizzy
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mermaid blood wrote:can men even...have 7 waffles?
I mean, Dan's a perfectionist. Maybe he thought the first six waffles just weren't... intense enough. So he was determined to try and, er, satisfy the beast.
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Those two and their inside jokes are going to be the death of me... :sideeye:

(Also that wombat legit looks like Dan, idk why but I associate the color brown to Dan more than black, it's like Phil and blue)
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mermaid blood wrote:oh...my god. you guys.

(spoiler- short Dapgo audio clip:)
dearest dizzy just sent me this that she kindly recorded (i can't get the audio till next week) and i can't stop replaying and smirking.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0aKmCDrw4V3
Dan: It was fun! Vegas is like a horrible, tacky theme park that is just like the worst place in the world, but yet really amazing and funny.
Phil: Yeah I loved it, I had a great time.
Dan: By that you mean, you had lots of waffles.
Phil: I had a lot of...intense waffles...

Um...what is with that tone? that makes no sense? and waffles, what has that got to do with Vegas? why did he just say intense about waffles? why did they make waffles into a euphemism with that suggestive tone? euphemism for what? the reason they had a great time on the night of Dan's birthday? what?
i can't believe that was an injoke between them this whole time. those cheeky bastards! that is hilarious to me. my mind is filling with the filthiest thoughts.
count me in on team 'this is gotta be an euphemism for something' sex, if it wasn't for the weird tone in which dan said waffles and the weird random pause in the middle of the sentence that phil did i'd think it's just them randomly jumping topics for no reason but like this?? i'm??? guys???? what are you trying to tell me here???

i'm thrilled that from now on phil's robotic breakfast tweets are gonna be way more fun to read

exhibit a
alittledizzy wrote:
mermaid blood wrote:can men even...have 7 waffles?
I mean, Dan's a perfectionist. Maybe he thought the first six waffles just weren't... intense enough. So he was determined to try and, er, satisfy the beast.
:lol:
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hiddenwombat
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Cora wrote:
mermaid blood wrote:oh...my god. you guys.

(spoiler- short Dapgo audio clip:)
dearest dizzy just sent me this that she kindly recorded (i can't get the audio till next week) and i can't stop replaying and smirking.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0aKmCDrw4V3
Dan: It was fun! Vegas is like a horrible, tacky theme park that is just like the worst place in the world, but yet really amazing and funny.
Phil: Yeah I loved it, I had a great time.
Dan: By that you mean, you had lots of waffles.
Phil: I had a lot of...intense waffles...

Um...what is with that tone? that makes no sense? and waffles, what has that got to do with Vegas? why did he just say intense about waffles? why did they make waffles into a euphemism with that suggestive tone? euphemism for what? the reason they had a great time on the night of Dan's birthday? what?
i can't believe that was an injoke between them this whole time. those cheeky bastards! that is hilarious to me. my mind is filling with the filthiest thoughts.
Eh, I'm not hearing a tone. Not a sexual inside-jokey one at least.

"I loved that club!"
"By that you mean you had lots of drinks"
"I had a lot of intense drinks"


Waffles can be intense when you're a British boy eating food stuffs in America where we make shit bigger and badder and cover it in whip and chocolate and kitchen sinks
i interpreted this as them using waffles as a stand in for alcohol and realising they have a young impressionable audience. They only showed very short clips of their time in Vegas but I can believe they went to a bar, got hammered on sweet sugary drinks and retired to their hotel room
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rizzo
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alittledizzy wrote:
mermaid blood wrote:can men even...have 7 waffles?
I mean, Dan's a perfectionist. Maybe he thought the first six waffles just weren't... intense enough. So he was determined to try and, er, satisfy the beast.
They were in Canada after all. Gotta get creative with all that maple syrup. I swear there's a fic about this.

As a ...mildly relevant... side note, these two really like to feed each other. The tiniest of dapgo spoilers below:
Didn't catch this was Phil's hand until the first time 'round.
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rizzo wrote:
alittledizzy wrote:
mermaid blood wrote:can men even...have 7 waffles?
Um, yes, if you get the male G-spot involved....

I mean, Dan's a perfectionist. Maybe he thought the first six waffles just weren't... intense enough. So he was determined to try and, er, satisfy the beast.
They were in Canada after all. Gotta get creative with all that maple syrup. I swear there's a fic about this.

As a ...mildly relevant... side note, these two really like to feed each other. The tiniest of dapgo spoilers below:
Didn't catch this was Phil's hand until the first time 'round.
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Um, what's dan trying to eat, the food or Phil's Fingers?
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alittledizzy
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hiddenwombat wrote:i interpreted this as them using waffles as a stand in for alcohol and realising they have a young impressionable audience. They only showed very short clips of their time in Vegas but I can believe they went to a bar, got hammered on sweet sugary drinks and retired to their hotel room
Nah - they don't shy away from talking about drinks and showing themselves drinking in other sections. Plus Dan has made entire main channel videos explicitly about drinking and being drunk. I don't see alcohol as something they'd feel the need to go that euphemistic about.

also it's just more fun for it to mean orgasms
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alittledizzy wrote:
hiddenwombat wrote:i interpreted this as them using waffles as a stand in for alcohol and realising they have a young impressionable audience. They only showed very short clips of their time in Vegas but I can believe they went to a bar, got hammered on sweet sugary drinks and retired to their hotel room
Nah - they don't shy away from talking about drinks and showing themselves drinking in other sections. Plus Dan has made entire main channel videos explicitly about drinking and being drunk. I don't see alcohol as something they'd feel the need to go that euphemistic about.

also it's just more fun for it to mean orgasms
true, although tbh i kind of want it to be alcohol because i would find it hilarious if they went 'think of the children!!!' when considering mentioning alcohol and then made a main channel video like the baking video where they casually made a bukkake joke

but yes orgasms are more fun
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rizzo wrote: As a ...mildly relevant... side note, these two really like to feed each other. The tiniest of dapgo spoilers below:
Didn't catch this was Phil's hand until the first time 'round.
Image
Ammm, Phil's fingers are practically inside Dan's mouth (?)...Wow that's so wow. What a time to be alive. :clapping:
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rizzo wrote:
alittledizzy wrote:
mermaid blood wrote:can men even...have 7 waffles?
I mean, Dan's a perfectionist. Maybe he thought the first six waffles just weren't... intense enough. So he was determined to try and, er, satisfy the beast.
They were in Canada after all. Gotta get creative with all that maple syrup. I swear there's a fic about this.

As a ...mildly relevant... side note, these two really like to feed each other. The tiniest of dapgo spoilers below:
Didn't catch this was Phil's hand until the first time 'round.
Image
holy shit.

add it to the food kink list! (someone...whoever is doing it...)

I am working my way through the book intensely slowly as i do other things, so forgive me for my discoveries page by page, but i didn't think waffles could be topped tonight:
um, page 20? the text above Dan's head getting his microphone fitted?
is Philip referencing Dan's prostate?
is that a thing that he does now? what is this new world we're living in? who even is Philip Lester?
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Finished the book and liked it! It was part bromantic/part husbandy/part two guys travelling which was a pretty great balance. Did I think it was trashy in some ways, yea. It seemed a bit catered to the younger audience and stayed majorly on brand throughout.

Chris H the sound guy is fineeeeeeee

Loved the family pics. Phils grandpa is my senpai and Dan and Colin are precious

I was honestly stuck on the pics in Florida for hours- to me that was the best part of the book because nothing seemed staged. Maybe the lack of crew helped but also, it'd be hard not to act couply around your future mother in law ;) . The fact that she came with them golfing and Dan took pics of her and Phil took me to different levels of trash. They looked so at ease and so relaxed- I MEAN SASSY HOBBIT WAS OUT FULL FORCE. Also Phil was wearing 6 different shirts in the pics with Dan so I'm guessing they went out everyday of the week to do couply stuff with the Lesters without the excuse of the tour.

Also the subtle shade by Phil on Dan about the pecking stalking pelican and the chill alligator (really reflects us Dan) Nature Phil is Dan's favorite thing to camera since we got so many pics of Philly trying to mate with them. My fave was Dan and squirrel

Loved the New York bus pics and them sitting on their knees, heads together, basking in the sights of New York City Also they look windswept and ethereal in the chess pictures.

I ship Chris the tech guy and Phil, matching shirts Isnt he the guy that patted Philly on the back and also held the light for his fringe check #phris is totes real

SF is literally 30 min away and I've been to every place they have so those pages made me go extra trash mode

First Starbucks pic caption: "two hunis" um DANIEL WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO SAY

The room service stories: loved them. And Phil no "romantic attraction". I sideeyed him hard for this but then maybe he was saying he never gets hit on?! Or atleast the bitch is blind to all the women (and men) clambering over him. Also since he said "human showing me romantic attention" and Dan is a confirmed wombat then phan is still real (im joking)

The Vegas pics were beautiful but I thought Phil said he lost all his money in slot machines but apparently he didnt?? *inserts Oprah's whats the truth gif*

Dan forcing crown on Phil's head How can they make fucking crafts so cute.

Dan is so naturally pretty in all these pics I'm envious (fave probably piano or STAR RATS pic)

Fave Phil pics are the one with Martyn on the mountain, him cuddled in a blanket, and his earmould pic
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